Lars and The Real Dismembered Pieces of People

Real Dolls.

We've talked about them once or twice in the past. But did you know they have an 'accessories' line? And I'm not talking about dress-up clothes and a Barbie Mansion.


Booby Balls

These are supposed to be stress relievers, but the idea of seeing any one of my coworkers sitting at their desk squeezing the shit out of one of those is breaking me out in hives.


Male Flat Back Torso


Real Doll Lingerie Bust


This one didn't have a name so I'll call it: Real Doll Creepy Pelvic Region


I'm begging someone to explain to me the appeal of having sex with just pieces of a person. I'm not judging here, I just don't get it. I can't imagine just sitting there with my Lingerie Bust staring at me with those creepy eyes and lack of lower body and arms and being turned on. I understand that there isn't always someone else there to have sex with when you want, and that this is safer than Craiglist Casual Encounters. I get that. I also understand that Real Dolls are expensive, which is why you might only want to purchase the important parts.

But isn't the majority of the appeal of the nude human form in the context of the entire package? Look at those boobies on this blog's header... those actually belong to a very attractive lady I found while perusing the interwebz for subject matter. Look at them now out of context...they're a little gross now, aren't they? Not so appealing.

Although, on second thought, perhaps it is LESS weird to desire human parts than to end up busting out a bright purple dildo or a Hello Kitty vibrator.

Maybe this:



isn't so strange after all.


What IS weird though, is making a your own doll out of cloth and taking a million photos of it and putting on the internet:






The vagina is made of Bubble Wrap for "extra sensation," says it's creator.



This guy is like 5 years away from keeping fat girls in a pit in his basement so he can wear their skin. I'm just sayin'