Soft Vore/Hard Vore

I don't even know how to start this post, so let's just get right into it.

It's going to be a doozy.

VORE

To quote WikiFur: Vorarephilia (or vore^[1][2]) is a fetish and paraphilia where arousal occurs from the idea of being eaten, eating another, or watching this process.^[3] The fantasy may include digestion, painless or otherwise. The word is derived from the Latin vorare (to 'swallow' or 'devour') and the Ancient Greek φιλία (philia, 'love'). 

Although most of the information I am going to present you on this subject is by or about Furries, let it be known that this is not a subculture limited to Furdom. Furries just have a tendency to be more accepting as a culture in general, so Vore thrives in their world.

Now, there is going to be a lot of text in this post, because this subject deserves to be explained well.  Oh don't worry, your brain will still melt.  I just want it to be better informed while melting.

Two Courses To Every Meal:

In the world of Vore, you are either Predator or Prey.  Like BDSM, you can eat or be eaten (pun very much intended.)

For either party, digestion may or may not be a part of the fantasy and it may or may not be painful. From what I gathered in my brief research, most Vore imagery seems to be without digestion.  It's more like being a baby in the womb.

Sort Vore:

Soft vore describes scenarios where prey is consumed alive and whole, often without being harmed before reaching the stomach. Because of its usually non-violent nature, soft vore is commonly regarded as more sensual and sexually oriented. Willing or unwilling prey in soft vore prey are either digested, asphyxiated, or simply held inside the stomach. Some vorarephiles who derive pleasure from watching animals eat other animals enjoy watching snakes eating, this is because they usually swallow their prey whole, a major element in soft vore

Sexy Animations - Best Animation - Snakes Gone Wild! - Click here for more home videos

Hard Vore:

Hard vore describes scenarios where prey is subjected to injuries of being ripped and chewed. This type of vore involves cutting, biting, tearing and usually also involves blood. Although inherently there is no sexual characteristic to these portrayals, to someone with a vore fetish, they could be taken in a sexual context. Hard vore has sometimes been referred to as "gore" to separate it from soft vore.^[6]

 

Gts Vore - Watch a funny movie here

But Vore isn't all srs bizness.

No.

Because there is...

COCK VORE!!!

VAGINAL VORE!!!
ANAL VORE!!!

Being a fantasy, any orifice may be thought of as capable of vore, but it's really just adding a body part to the word vore. This incorrect use of the word vore is now common place. Examples of this well known twisting of the word vore are the "genital vore" scenarios, which includes unbirth. Unbirthing involves being consumed by the vagina and taking refuge in the woman's womb,^[8] which is simply a "reverse birth" and, in a pure sense, can only be done by a female. It is sometimes referred to as "Female Genital Vore" or "vaginal vore." Others think of it as a mutual, erotic and consensual activity with no injury to the sexual partners involved — in that case it is not considered a form of vore.^[8]

 

That is supposed to be an Orca Whale btw.  On land.  With breasts. And legs.

I dunno.

"Male Genital Vore," commonly called cock vore, refers to being consumed by the penis.^[9] This involves the urethral opening at the top of the penis, after which they are pulled down the urethra to the predator's scrotum, in which prey is absorbed, digested, or turned into semen (sometimes known as "cum vore") and ejaculated. A lesser known variant involves the prey to be taken to the prostate for conversion to semen, or to the bladder for storage or digestion.^[10]

 

Not well known, Anal vore describes being consumed by the anus.^[11] In common scenarios, prey consumed through anal vore is often drawn up through the digestive tract to the stomach where they are digested in a normal fashion. Such is not always the case, as the prey may simply remain in the rectum of the predator for a varying length of time.

Of course, Anal Vore comes with video:

The guy below refers to his anus as "Char-rump" because everything bad always leads back to Pokemon:

I like how he narrates you through it all.  So soothing.

Most vorarephiles are aware of the inherent silliness of their fetish, and are largely uninterested in the idea of cannibalism.

But not above putting plastic dinosaurs in their buttholes.

TOMORROW ON THIS LIL PORNOMINE:

Action Pants.

Most Discussed

**IF YOU READ THIS LIL PORNO MINE ON A MAC AND YOU ARE HAVING TROUBLE VIEWING THE VIDEOS (with the exception of that AleXxX video that got deleted last week and I've been too lazy to remove the post) YOU MIGHT WANT TO CHECK INTO WHAT SORT OF PLUGINS YOU NEED TO VIEW VIDEOS. I WAS ON A MAC THIS WEEKEND AND IT WORKED JUST FINE BECAUSE THE OWNER OF SAID MAC HAD THE RIGHT PLUGINS. YOU ARE A LOSER...SHAINA :)**

I was trolling xtube looking for the rumoured Its Chris Crocker videos, (which I couldn't find. And have since decided I do not want to see if they DO exist), when I saw that there is a most discussed section.

Hmm what are the people talking about on Xtube?

Well, apparently it's this:



I said before I don't ever really want to make fun of someone's genitalia, but...

WTF IS GOING ON THERE?

Everyone on Xtube seems to share my confusion:


what is that?!?!


Added by ezdzit20 on 5 months

what the hell


Added by hartbreakkid85 on 5 months

My sentiments exactly.

But then I got to thinking that it's probably a hermaphrodite. Which is something I don't come across to often. She-males, chicks with dicks, what have you are one thing... being born with both sets of privates is a whole 'nother thing, ya know what I'm sayin'? (omg sorry I just watched that Chris Crocker video again.)

I got all excited for the possiblity of hermaphrodite porn, so I looked to see if the person who posted it had other videos. The person who posted it, who's Xtube username is literally arandomusername had only one other video.



Now I'm even more confused.

Let's go over what we know so far:

Male characteristics:
1. Flat Chest
2. Penis?

Female characteristics:
1. Labia...really huge labia
2. Clitoris?

Yeah seriously, this is getting me nowhere so I turned my attention away from the video and to what little information that was available about arandomusername, (I feel like I'm trapped in an updated version of one of SNL's It's Pat! skits...it's username is even neutral as hell, geez!)

I started with the video's tags: boner, cock, ftm (female to male...A HINT!), jacking, jerkoff, transman (another clue), small, and tman.

Lest you think I am that well educated in the world of sex, let me tell you right now that I had no idea what ftm meant. So I clicked on the tag and sure enough, several other videos of basically the same thing popped up: unidentifiable genitalia being masturbated by its owners.

So I had not stumbled upon some hermaphrodite porn (alas, another day dear readers) but something completely new that had never crossed my mind. I was so used to seeing chicks with dicks, that I didn't know when an actual chick with a "dick" was right in front of my face!

(Also readers, remind me when I finally DO post about She-males to talk about Absolute T-Girls.)


Anyway, now that we know what's going on here, the video sort of loses it's mystique don't you think?

So let's see what else Xtubers are talking about:



This video is a little long for what it is, so you really only need to watch it for a minute or so to figure out whats going on...unless you want to get to like 3:45 where his penis looks like it's died.

I originally clicked on this video because it was called: Handsfree edging with aneros and I though that meant this guy was gonna stick a handsfree cellphone device up his ass. Yeah, it took some googling before I realized he wasn't.

The device he's using is sort of genius. You stick the prostate massager up your ass and the stimulation on your prostate cause you to clench down, thus causing the other part of the device to press down on your perineum...which delays your orgasm.

So you don't have to touch yourself. Hands Free. Get it? ...sorry.

One more thing, the first comment for this video is:

don't know if it means much, but your cum on your shirt looks like a scorpion.


Added by gruntlo on 4 months

It does!

Dead Men Tell No Tales

Ok, I'm about to post about necrophilia and I can't get past this:



Yep, I'm clicking and I'm taking you with me.

My coworker Tyler, through a random series of events involving stick figures (don't ask) had the idea that I should post about necrophilia. At the risk of going too far, I agreed.

I figured that Necrophilia's presence on the web would be hard to come by and secretive, like child porn. You know, where you CAN find it if you try hard enough but I'm not trying that hard to watch someone fuck a dead body...and for the most part I'm right. But Necrophilia is fortunate to share it's audience with a far more acceptable (read: less disturbing) niche: Sleepy Sex.

Sleepy Sex is pretty self-explanatory: Sexual acts with a (presumably) unsuspecting sleeping person. It's like really non-aggressive rape. But Sleepy Sex for the most part keeps itself defined seperately from the nightvision videos you see of drunk college girls passed out with like 50 frat boys fucking them. Cause THAT'S rape.

Sleepy Sex videos always almost end with the sleeper waking up delighted to be in whatever situation they've found themselves in...which is more often than not something involving their feet:



Who sleeps in Stripper Heels? And crotchless pants? Did stripper heels really deserve to be capitalized? And why didn't crotchless pants get capitalized, as they are clearly more innovative and I'm 100% sure they're more comfortable??

Anyway, after Tyler's (possibly genius) suggestion, I set out to see how much Necrophilia I could find online. That sentence alone is going to send my mother to her grave for sure...no pun intended.

Well Readers, it took about two seconds to find "Rob's Necrophilia Fantasy."

And now we can begin this journey together, through Rob's Fantasy...which may very well end up being our collective nightmare, readers. I apologize in advance.

After clicking on the girl in the casket a demographic survey comes up. My first thought was, "This better not ask me how old I am and if I have any fatal diseases.." but really, the survey is very innocent. Rob just wants to know how you got here and why you're here, and the whole thing feels almost like a clinical research study:

Question #3 -
Why are you here?
(select the best response)
I arrived by accident and have no particular interest; just curious.

I am doing a research paper or background for an article or book or investigation.

I'm just curious. I wanted more information for general knowledge.

I'm just curious. I have feelings along the lines of sleepysex.

I'm just curious. I have feelings along the lines of necrophilia.

I'm just curious. Someone I know has feelings of sleepysex.

I'm just curious. Someone I know has feelings of necrophilia.

lol someone I know has feelings of sleepysex.

I opted to skip the survey, just because I was too anxious to see what lay beyond it in Rob's Fantasy. The next page is a welcome page, complete with a quote from Socrates, (who is dead...just an FYI for all you necrophiliacs out there. Ok ok, I promise, no more bad necro jokes!)

I think it would be best to let Rob take over momentarily:

In my wanderings around the Internet I have met many people who have had very serious concerns about their feelings of death and sexuality. Many think they are perverts... some think they are in need of mental help... and some have even gone so far as to consider suicide... all because of not simply understanding their own feelings.
Consider these recent contacts I've had...

*A young female teacher wrote telling me about her feelings about imagining herself dead and being ravished sexually.
*A middle-aged lawyer, married-with-kids, told me about his many years of guilt in having the sexual urge to make love to his wife while she was totally unconscious.
*A doctor revealed to me his guilt over having had real life sex with a dead female... and did that make him a necrophiliac?
*A female teen (I get many teens writing to me... and not necessarily for necro interests) wrote to me thinking she might have a mental illness because of her fantasies of the love of her life making love to her unconscious body.
* A cop from New York who wants to share his necro feelings with his wife but is afraid.
*A 19 year old coed from Virginia feeling guilt over having thoughts about wanting to make love to dead males.
* A 25 year old secretary from Los Angeles who's boyfriend recently died in an accident and writes that she is having feelings of wishing she could make love one last time to his body... and did those feelings make her "nuts"?
*A 33 year old corporate executive from Canada who was abused as a child, suffering from manic depression as a result, and has sexual feelings of being found dead and sexually used.
*A gay male government employee from Des Moines fighting his urges to want to have sex with dead men.

The list goes on... and if you fall into any of these categories or another one totally different, you are most assuredly NOT alone. The point to remember is that while you're feelings are unique to yourself, they are not unique to the world.

The way Rob writes could make me feel good about anything! Seriously!

From this point there is a table of contents. There are several articles outlining how to deal with your blossoming love for the dead and/or the sleeping. But in order to keep this entry from becoming less like a funny Porno Mine read and more like a thesis paper, I think we'll skip ahead to:

THIS REALLY FUCKING CREEPY IM EXCHANGE ABOUT A GUY FUCKING HIS DEAD WIFE

NOTE FROM THE PRON: THIS IS LONG SO I WENT AHEAD AND BOLDED THE...GOOD? BAD? HORRIFYING? PARTS FOR THE TL;DR CROWD. MY COMMENTARY WILL BE IN ITALICS NEXT TO THE BOLDED STUFF. THIS IS RIDIC!!!

tom_tormented (2:43:26 PM): Unfortunately, my wife died suddenly on May the 25th of this year. Her pictures when alive are in my profile...and in my profiles "photo" folder as well. Take a moment to look.
shadowmn (2:43:49 PM): Oh I am so so sorry... how did she die?
tom_tormented (2:45:06 PM): Sorry, my son came in the room and started talking to me...
tom_tormented (2:45:11 PM): I'm back.
tom_tormented (2:45:23 PM): Well, the cause has yet to be "officially" determined. THIS GUY'S USE OF QUOTATIONS IS GONNA MAKE YOU PULL YOUR HAIR OUT BY THE END OF THIS
tom_tormented (2:45:35 PM): However, the initial thought is that it was a blood clot to the brain. THAT'S QUITE A DIAGNOSIS FOR A FIRST-TIMER
tom_tormented (2:45:40 PM): It was almost instant.
shadowmn (2:45:45 PM): jeezz.. I am so sorry, friend.
tom_tormented (2:46:05 PM): She smiled at me...her pupils dilated...her head fell back and she took four breaths and was gone.
tom_tormented (2:46:10 PM): Did you see her pics yet?
shadowmn (2:46:15 PM): yes
Note: Being a sexually expressive couple, the pics he refers to here were of her in some sexually provocative positions as they enjoyed sharing these to the world. ROB TYPED THAT NOT ME. OBVIOUSLY, CAUSE I WOULD HAVE BEEN LIKE: OMFG THEN THEY SHOWED ME PICTURES OF THEM DOING IT EW!
tom_tormented (2:46:27 PM): It was fast...and from what I have been told...painless.
tom_tormented (2:46:35 PM): She was gone instantly.
tom_tormented (2:46:54 PM): We had been married for 14 years.
shadowmn (2:46:54 PM): Such a tragic loss
shadowmn (2:47:14 PM): Where are you from?
tom_tormented (2:47:20 PM): MS
tom_tormented (2:47:31 PM): Eastern, MS...
shadowmn (2:47:33 PM): ah ok.. Illinois, recently in AZ at the moment
tom_tormented (2:47:49 PM): Ok, cool.
shadowmn (2:47:51 PM): I am so sorry.. truly.
tom_tormented (2:48:04 PM): Yea, it's tough...I am a single dad with 3 kids now.
shadowmn (2:48:16 PM): Please tell me you made last love to her somehow. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I SAY TO SOMEONE WHO HAS LOST A LOVED ONE
tom_tormented (2:48:28 PM): Yes, at home.
shadowmn (2:48:48 PM): You didn't call the paramedics right away?
tom_tormented (2:49:07 PM): I did...but where we live is very far out...I knew that I have almost 20 minutes with her.
shadowmn (2:49:20 PM): May I ask what you did with her OH GOD...
tom_tormented (2:50:03 PM): Yes, we always sleep in the nude...so, she was already naked. We were going to bed and she was reading her latest Stephen King novel.
tom_tormented (2:50:21 PM): She would read every night before turning off the light on her side of the bed.
shadowmn (2:50:36 PM): ok
tom_tormented (2:50:37 PM): This night, she looked at me and said "huh, that's funny?"
tom_tormented (2:50:41 PM): And I said "What?"
tom_tormented (2:50:56 PM): She said, "my cheek just went numb."
shadowmn (2:51:04 PM): ohh
tom_tormented (2:51:04 PM): I looked at her and she smiled.
tom_tormented (2:51:23 PM): Then she said "maybe it's a tooth thing. I need to see a dentist."
tom_tormented (2:51:27 PM): She went back to reading.
tom_tormented (2:51:40 PM): Then she said, "Wow, my fingers are tingling."
tom_tormented (2:51:43 PM): It was her left hand.
shadowmn (2:52:00 PM): ah.. a stroke huh
tom_tormented (2:52:03 PM): Then, she started to sweat. I got up and went to get her some wet towels to put on her head.
tom_tormented (2:52:29 PM): By the time I came back she was on her back. Just staring up.
tom_tormented (2:52:39 PM): I asked her if she was "OK" and she smiled.
tom_tormented (2:52:55 PM): She said, "I'll be fine" and then immediately gritted her teeth.
tom_tormented (2:53:06 PM): Her pupils opened all the way and the brown of her eyes dissapeard.
tom_tormented (2:53:32 PM): Her eyes were solid black...her head went back (as if having an orgasm) and she took four breaths.
tom_tormented (2:53:39 PM): Then, she was dead.
shadowmn (2:53:50 PM): how tragic..
tom_tormented (2:54:02 PM): She was 41 years old
tom_tormented (2:54:06 PM): Perfect health.
shadowmn (2:54:12 PM): go figure
tom_tormented (2:54:31 PM): So, I called 911 and decided to wait.
tom_tormented (2:55:07 PM): Sorry...son walked in again...
shadowmn (2:55:10 PM): np
tom_tormented (2:56:04 PM): So, basically, she was there...naked on the bed...and I was crying like a baby. It started with me kissing her forehead...caressing her breasts and kissing her lips. Most of the time I was saying "my God Kate...why did this happen!"
shadowmn (2:56:21 PM): I can only imagine
tom_tormented (2:56:31 PM): It was very intimate. Hard to explain really....pure emotion.
tom_tormented (2:56:59 PM): At this time, somewhere deep in my brain...I realized that I would never have the opportunity to make love to her again. I DON'T LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING....
shadowmn (2:57:05 PM): yeah
tom_tormented (2:57:27 PM): Knowing how long the medics would take, and the fact that she was totally naked and they would never know "what" she was doing when she died...I decided to make love to her.
tom_tormented (2:58:01 PM): I spread her legs. Got some "astroglide" out of our "toy" drawer and lubricated myself.
shadowmn (2:58:10 PM): You experienced a rare intimacy few ever experience with a loved one who died
tom_tormented (2:58:34 PM): Then I slowly inserted into her (crying the whole time) and began to move.
shadowmn (2:58:38 PM): ok
shadowmn (2:58:44 PM): You said you had to lube yourself up before entering her.. was that cause you are large or more simply for feeling enhancement?
tom_tormented (3:58:55 PM): She was very dry and I am about 8 inches.
tom_tormented (2:59:04 PM): It was odd, because she was so still. She was a very responsive lover and her vaginal muscles were "milking" muscles...that sensation was missing.
tom_tormented (2:59:09 PM): She was actually very loose.
shadowmn (2:59:23 PM): yeah, I bet ...YEAH I BET. SHADOWMN KNOWS ALL ABOUT THE VAG GOING ALL LOOSEY-GOOSEY AFTER ITS OWNER DIES...
tom_tormented (2:59:28 PM): Also, while I was doing her she pissed a little.
shadowmn (2:59:47 PM): that's normal..
tom_tormented (2:59:57 PM): I kept kissing her...sucking her breasts and pumping. All I could think about was that this was the last time I would ever cum in her.
shadowmn (3:00:14 PM): smart guy IS HE BEING SARCASTIC?
tom_tormented (3:00:41 PM): So, about 10 minutes passed and I began to worry if the medics would use the siren or just pull up and knock.
tom_tormented (3:01:01 PM): I also noticed that there was some skin color change where I was touching her.
tom_tormented (3:01:42 PM): The back of her neck was starting to get darker (purple in color) and it was as if all her blood was rushing to her back.
shadowmn (3:01:50 PM): yes
tom_tormented (3:01:56 PM): I could even notice that she was getting cooler.
tom_tormented (3:02:07 PM): Not much...but some.
tom_tormented (3:02:15 PM): Enough to tell.
shadowmn (3:02:20 PM): yeah
tom_tormented (3:02:48 PM): So, I hurried up and had an intense orgasm inside her.
shadowmn (3:02:57 PM): good
tom_tormented (3:03:21 PM): I pulled out and she started to drip. So I got a T-shirt of hers and wiped her off on the outside.
shadowmn (3:03:33 PM): Think of taking any pics?
tom_tormented (3:03:49 PM): Yes.
shadowmn (3:04:00 PM): good man. you can always remember her that way
shadowmn (3:04:11 PM): your last time together
tom_tormented (3:04:15 PM): Yes.
tom_tormented (3:04:34 PM): Luckily, she loved the camera in life...I have over 3000 pics of her nude or during sex.
tom_tormented (3:04:39 PM): So, it seemed fitting. OK, FOR THE RECORD: NO MATTER HOW MUCH I LOVE THE CAMERA IN LIFE, I AM NOT GOING TO LOVE IT IN DEATH. ESPECIALLY IF I'M NAKED AND YOU JUST FUCKED MY DEAD BODY.
shadowmn (3:04:44 PM): yeah
shadowmn (3:05:24 PM): My real name is ____.. "Rob" is a pen name for the site
tom_tormented (3:05:33 PM): Ok, cool.
tom_tormented (3:05:35 PM): I am Tom.
shadowmn (3:05:51 PM): Nice to meet you, Tom.. yet sad at the reason.
tom_tormented (3:06:16 PM): Yes, I am still pretty broken up about it. It was my research on embalming that led me to your site.
shadowmn (3:06:32 PM): I imagine the assholes did an autopsy on her?
tom_tormented (3:06:39 PM): 3
shadowmn (3:06:42 PM): pricks
tom_tormented (3:06:52 PM): Yea, she was an organ donor too.
tom_tormented (3:07:03 PM): 6 people got parts of her.
shadowmn (3:07:13 PM): Well, that is good. But sad they slice her pristine body all up.
tom_tormented (3:07:25 PM): Yes, very true. Hard to think about at times.
shadowmn (3:07:49 PM): Maybe at least a little of you is resting inside her.
tom_tormented (3:08:23 PM): Yes, I am sure.
tom_tormented (3:09:17 PM): When I was done...I put her hands on her chest and took a few pictures.
shadowmn (3:09:26 PM): Thanks for sharing your story. Actually.. it's a main basis for my site. Necro laws sucks.. and family members should be allowed to do what they wish with their loved ones.
tom_tormented (3:09:50 PM): Would you like to see a picture of her from after?
shadowmn (3:10:22 PM): If you would like to share in the moment and let me see a couple pics I'd be honored.. but rest assured I don't post this stuff nor hand it around. I'd loose my credibility if I did that
tom_tormented (3:10:40 PM): Ok, well, I blurred her face for safety anyway.
shadowmn (3:10:45 PM): ok
tom_tormented (3:10:55 PM): I will also share one of her in her coffin...if you wish.
shadowmn (3:11:01 PM): yes.. thanks
tom_tormented (3:12:10 PM): I took her wedding ring off in these pics...so she can't be identified by it.
tom_tormented (3:12:57 PM): Did the 1st pic come through?
shadowmn (3:13:00 PM): yes
shadowmn (3:13:22 PM): she's very attractive
tom_tormented (3:13:38 PM): Thanks.
shadowmn (3:13:51 PM): I am so so sorry Tom
tom_tormented (3:13:59 PM): Thanks again.
tom_tormented (3:37:56 PM): Well, before the medics arrived...I shaved her pussy and kept all the hair.
shadowmn (3:38:03 PM): good man
shadowmn (4:16:18 PM): Interesting visual one can muster up with that image after you did her when she died.
tom_tormented (4:16:59 PM): I really rammed hard because she was so loose.
shadowmn (4:17:23 PM): I'm sure she would have orgasmed good
tom_tormented (4:17:40 PM): The problem was that she kept sliding up the bed...and her head would start to hit the headboard...then I would have to stop and grab her ankles and pull her back down...it was odd.
shadowmn (4:17:52 PM): yeah
shadowmn (4:18:05 PM): She was large breasted..
tom_tormented (4:18:28 PM): Yea, but I held on to them or was on her most of the time.
shadowmn (4:18:35 PM): good
tom_tormented (4:18:55 PM): When the paramedics arrived, she was still naked on the bed.
tom_tormented (4:19:02 PM): It was two young guys.
shadowmn (4:19:13 PM): was she still dripping at that time?
tom_tormented (4:19:26 PM): Not until they picked her up and moved her to the gurney.
tom_tormented (4:19:31 PM): Then she gushed a little.
shadowmn (4:19:38 PM): kinda obvious then
tom_tormented (4:19:41 PM): The guy on the foot end was a little shaken.
shadowmn (4:20:05 PM): why
tom_tormented (4:20:17 PM): Seeing the cum come out of her...he looked a bit shocked.
shadowmn (4:20:21 PM): ohh hehe
tom_tormented (4:20:42 PM): I told them that we were fucking when she died.
shadowmn (4:20:56 PM): I bet that got him going too
tom_tormented (4:21:07 PM): I guess. LOL.
tom_tormented (4:21:29 PM): I do wonder about that medic. THE PRON HAS BEEN RENDERED SPEECHLESS...TYPELESS..WHATEVER.
tom_tormented (4:22:10 PM): She was totally gone...no more that could be done. They put her in the ambulance and one of the medics rode in the back with her to the hospital. Why? What is the point if she was dead?
tom_tormented (4:22:24 PM): Made me wonder.
tom_tormented (4:42:47 PM): So, I know this is a touchy issue...but do many of the people you talk to have a "faith" of some kind...or does it take someone who isn't religious to enjoy the dead.
shadowmn (4:44:29 PM): Oh.. people are all over the chart when it comes to sex with the dead and morality. Even in my own situation.. fantasy.. I am never 'fucking' the dead.. but making love with them.. it's a spiritual thing for me in a way. Not religious though. But even those who 'lust' for the dead can be religious if they hold to the idea that the soul leaves the body with the last breath.. and after that it's just an empty vessl.
shadowmn (4:44:54 PM): Hell, the Bible says that much
tom_tormented (4:45:06 PM): Well, I can be honest there...my wife was GONE the moment she died.
shadowmn (4:45:35 PM): Then who/what did you make love to?
tom_tormented (4:46:01 PM): To her body. To what I had left. Her spirit...her soul...was gone.
shadowmn (4:46:17 PM): Did you 'fuck' her remains or make love?
tom_tormented (4:46:27 PM): Made love to them...that was all I had.
shadowmn (4:46:41 PM): Then you have nothing to regret.
tom_tormented (4:46:46 PM): But I knew Lyn was gone.
shadowmn (4:46:49 PM): Are you feeling guilt?
tom_tormented (4:46:51 PM): Nope.
shadowmn (4:46:55 PM): good
shadowmn (4:47:15 PM): If you had more time would you have made more love with her body?
tom_tormented (4:47:41 PM): I don't think so...I truly feel it would have cheapened the experience.
shadowmn (4:48:06 PM): I can see both sides.. but you did what you felt was right and that's all thats imoortant
tom_tormented (4:48:32 PM): For a brief moment I thought about eating her...but the libricant (and the fact she was leaking piss) really prevented that.
shadowmn (4:55:01 PM): I'm sorry for your loss, Tom.
tom_tormented (4:55:13 PM): Thank you.
tom_tormented (4:55:23 PM): It was nice talking to you.
shadowmn (4:55:31 PM): was nice talking to you too.
shadowmn (4:55:42 PM): what do you do for a living
tom_tormented (4:56:09 PM): I work for a large electronics chain.
tom_tormented (4:56:19 PM): My wife was a newspaper editor.
shadowmn (4:58:08 PM): Had sex with anyone since?
tom_tormented (4:58:21 PM): Nope. COUPLE THINGS: 1. SHADOWMN'S LINE OF QUESTIONING IS SO ODD.. "SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS, WHERE DO YOU WORK?" 2. I'M GLAD THAT HE WAS TOO GOOD TO GO DOWN ON HIS WIFE CAUSE SHE HAD PEED A LITTLE BUT NOT TOO GOOD TO FUCK HER WHILE SHE WAS DEAD...I'M JUST SAYIN..
shadowmn (4:58:26 PM): didn't think so.
tom_tormented (4:58:27 PM): No rebounds.
tom_tormented (4:58:45 PM): But, there is someone special who may...in the future...be there for me
tom_tormented (4:58:48 PM): Only time will tell.
shadowmn (4:58:52 PM): good
shadowmn (4:59:51 PM): I need to break away for a few Tom.. I'll be sitting online here but in the background for a while. I'd enjoy chatting later if you wish.
tom_tormented (5:00:15 PM): No problem...talk to you later. Bye.
shadowmn (5:00:19 PM): adios for now.

Ok, I'm sure you need a moment to recover from that too...so let's take a moment.












Alright, I'm feeling a little better, although I feel that my shower water will never quite be hot enough to make me ever feel clean after having read that.

But I do want to throw in my two cents here:

Rob says a lot on his website about how Necro laws should allow family members to do as they please with their loved one's bodies. As someone who took more than a class or two on the subject, (try two years of mortuary science schooling), I can say that in part I agree with that. I believe that if my husband wishes to be buried in the backyard, or cremated and have his ashes put in a flagpole, than he should be granted that wish. But non consensual sex is still rape, whether you were married and dead or strangers and alive. So unless it is indicated in that person's last will and testament, sex with the dead should be off limits.

Lest you think the Pron has gotten all moral on you, let me remind you, I think fetishes are healthy and awesome...and there are plenty of living people willing to play dead and have sex with you. Or you could get a real doll.

Or you could stick a dead octopus in your vagina:



There's a video of that happening, so I can verify that's what happened, but the site it's on is so virus-inducing and pop-up crazy that I'll spare you.

Sorry guys.

WELL HELLO THERE, IS THAT VAGINA I SMELL OR ARE YOU JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME??

When I started this blog, I really thought of myself as sort of an amateur sex expert. But as of today, I realize I have NO IDEA what's going on in the world of sex.

With that said...

WELL HELLO THERE, IS THAT VAGINA I SMELL OR ARE YOU JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME??

Oh, that's not VAGINA? It's VULVA:



Yep, you can now purchase "The precious vagina fragrance put into a small vial." (The website URL for vagina perfume is priceless btw: www.smellmeand.com)

But if you don't feel like buying it, you can always get it the old fashioned way. And luckily, there's a product made for the nights when you just HAVE to smell some vag but forgot to pay the electric bill:



Thank GOD, right? I mean, who else here hates fumbling around with genitals in the dark? One thing I think we can all agree on (and that we all probably learned from porn) is that nothing makes your no no spots look better than a bright light focused directly on them. Mmmm... it's like the butcher display case, and that TURNS ME ON.

Another thing you probably hate is when an anal sex encounter presents itself and you're not ready. But fear not, because there is even an invention for you:



It claims to hold "just the right amount of liquid." I may be wrong, but I feel like if you're already getting an enema, it just all feels wrong.

Another thing that feels wrong are SHARK TEETH ON ANY PENIS COMING ANYWHERE NEAR ME!



I'm sorry but the only stimulation those are giving me are the creeps.

Also:

If you're a dude, gay or straight, and you are so lazy that you need this to jerk yourself off, you should just cut it off:



My advice? Sit on your usual jerk off hand until it's numb, then touch your peen. I've heard that makes it feel like someone else is touching it. That, and it doesn't cost $40 to do that.

My friends and I have been recoiling in horror from the discovery of the Pussy Foot for the past few days:



But after looking at it for awhile, I have decided it's kind of ingenius. So I invented one for the ladies:



It's just a prototype but...well..C'MON LADIES..HOP ON!!!!!


...no? FINE. SEE IF I EVER INVENT ANOTHER SEX TOY AGAIN EVER!

But if the whole, vagina on the bottom of a severed foot thing weirds you out, may I suggest this weird clear foot with an opening at the bottom and purple beads inside?



It looks like you're fucking an ice sculpture.

People need to make more videos of them having sex with weird sex toys, cause seriously, the pickings are slim. Actually, the pickings are this:




I guess it's supposed to be a promo video for the Fleshlight, but all I see is a girl moaning while she touches it.


It's THAT GOOD.

Self Inflicted Rape?

When you log onto XTube and you're not signed in it asks you what kind of content you would like to view today. This is the image that comes up:



Clearly being bisexual is what would make you happiest.

On to the post...

I just really haven't been up for watching porno. I write this blog at work, and frankly I have been over-stressed and swamped and headachey and generally not in the mood. But for everyone's sake I am forcing myself to update.

Is forcing myself to watch porn considered rape? Am I raping myself? I could use some roofies right now, I bet my headache would go away....

And speaking of rape, what is going on here???



I couldn't get any audio going on this clip, so I assume there is none. There was no description or anything, which means I am forced to speculate:

HER VAGINA MUST BE RANCID.

Sometimes stating the obvious is best.

Or maybe he's gay. But I guess that doesn't really make any sense, considering not only is he IN this situation.. but they're filming it. Then again, nothing in pornography makes any sense to me anymore after the last post. Maybe I should just leave it alone before it makes the brain tumor I'm convinced I have explode.

Then again, why am I trying to make sense of the world of porno, when there is this:




Good ol' nonsensical Porno!